courage and creativity

"But courage and creativity are linked, for all serious creation requires intellectual courage. It is frightening to enter your workroom early in the morning and face an empty canvas, a blank sheet of paper, or a score sheet, knowing that must inscribe the marks of a completely original work. The fact that you have done it before helps, if only in the sense that you know you can do it. But this never quite removes the fear."

~Paul Johnson, Creators

Bugger. I had already written this quote to post today when I got some discouraging news. The play for which I was hoping to intern (in costumes) this summer was cancelled. I'm not sure where that leaves me - I'll have to email my contact and see if they'd still be needing an intern. I hadn't even filled out the aps yet, but I've been looking forward to it for some time so it's discouraging nonetheless.

On a happier note, thank you all for the ENcouraging comments on my latest dress. Some people expressed interest in techniques for sewing with knits, so I may post that soon. Take care all!

she sews, she knits, she sews knits

After wearing this dress twice without any decent pictures, today I finally snatched it off my bedroom floor (where else would it be while waiting to be washed?), put it on the dress form, and snapped away. Please excuse the lint and wrinkles.

This is my first time working with a knit fabric, something I've been meaning to do for some time. As is my tendency, I did a fair bit of research before starting. Some of it was helpful, but most of it only succeeded in intimidating me. Instead I ended up working from my observations of ready-to-wear garments, with healthy dose of instinct thrown in.

I still need to work on my finishing techniques (is there a way to finish crosswise seams without rippling?), but for a first try I'm really, really, happy with the results. And in love with my twin needle. And stabilizing elastic.

Also, this was my first Built by Wendy pattern (lengthened and altered for knit, of course). There's a lot of good stuff I could say here, but I think I'll save it for another post. Let's just say I'm eagerly looking forward to her next book.

I love, love, love this dress! The fabric is a very fine black cotton rib, heavier than a jersey but not quite a sweater knit. It's so comfortable, and it's the perfect dress up/dress down piece. Now I just have to come up with a name for it. Did I mention that I love it?

Okay, so these pictures are decent, just my hair isn't! Thanks, Dad!

but let a splinter swerve -

I love getting mail. So you can imagine how ecstatic I was when a package came last week from my dear friend Heidi, containing (among other things) a new inspiration journal. With blank, unlined pages. In eggplant purple.

Thank you, my dear. It's perfect. I inaugurated it by copying this poem into it.

Speaking of poems, I've also added a booklist to the sidebar on my blogger account. Although it doesn't come up much here, my training is in literature. I think the main reason it doesn't come up much is because my artistic expression doesn't match my training: I'm no writer.

Still, my study and enjoyment of story heavily influences my work. I love reading the textures and nuances of the page and interpretting them in fabric. With a pen I will never match the wit of Austen, the poignancy of Dickinson, or the raw honesty of Eliot. But with a needle in hand and their words in my heart, at least I can attempt it.

I've just finished This Heavy Silence, a new novel that speaks of remorse and forgiveness without ever falling into sentimentalism. Next up: Creators by Paul Johnson. What are you reading lately, and how does it influence your work?

cowl = cow + l, rhymes with towel

Thanks everyone for your words of encouragement on the last post. It's refreshing to know that others struggle with the same things. The blogging community is a wonderful, inspiring place, but it poses a trap in the temptation to blindly follow others' work. I think that Blanche said a true thing: we create "unique art by building on or breaking down what already exist[s]." It's the consciousness of that process that I want to work on most.

After all that, I feel somewhat phony posting a project so directly inspired by others' work! After seeing the lovely cowls of Jenny and Ellybeth, though, I couldn't wait to make one for myself. Finding the right yarn slowed me down a bit - originally I thought green, but greens are tricky and nothing I found would suit. I settled on Nature's Choice organic cotton in Walnut, using a textured stitch to liven up the "putty-colored yarn" (my sister's words - thanks M).

While I love the way the cowl turned out, I'm still not quite sold on the yarn. I was excited at the outset - an all natural yarn that's readily available and doesn't cost a fortune! As soon as I started knitting with it, though, it began pilling. It is very soft and drapey and the stitch pattern distracts from the pilling somewhat, but still . . .

I shouldn't complain too much, though - seeing as I've worn it with everything the past 3 days! I wanted a more drapey, pashmina effect than the "orignals," and I'm quite pleased with the window-pane stitch I developed for it. It also looks great with the sewing project I finished up this weekend - but more on that later!

Note: Title is taken from a conversation with the 6-year old twins I babysit for. "Whatchya makin'? A cow?!?"

One of the things that is becoming more important to me is that of recording my own inspiration. As much as I love all of you, I do have somewhat of a mockingbird complex - I tend to mimic and imitate those artists that I find beautiful, losing track of my own "voice" in the process.

Now of course, there is "nothing new under the sun" - art is not made in a vacuum, and we all work from inspiration and influences. I don't claim to be immune from that. What I need to work on is being conscientious about finding and recording inspirations from my daily life, instead of living vicariously through others' work.

Simple as it is, this is somewhat scary for me. Most of the people I know would classify me as someone with a defined sense of personal style and asthetic. So to admit that it's not always the case, to revisit and critically analyze that definition, is something very daunting indeed.